Leaving, Living, Loving
by peetagoreantheorem12
Summary: A lonely 30-year old Katniss Everdeen might have the money and the power that she wants, but 18-year old Peeta is capable of giving her what she needs.
1. Chapter 1

**I already uploaded this chapter before, but I had to delete it for some reason.**

 **I do not own The Hunger Games.**

* * *

 **Chapter 1**

Raised in a wealthy community, it was not surprising to Katniss that all her life, she was taught that once you're on top, you can't ever slip down. Even at a young age, her parents made sure that that in every action, every interaction she would have, something beneficial would come out of it. Think like a business woman, Katniss. Just like what her mother would say.

Her parents were owners of a mining site. And it wasn't just a mining site, where you obtain coals or simple necessities no one cared about in the age of time. It was The Site. Gold? Silver? You would find them. Katniss can guarantee. And she had 30 years of stories of sweetness and pain to support the claim.

It was an enormous challenge for Katniss to follow the footsteps of her parents. But there was no room for fear. A challenge means an opportunity. And opportunities may mean huge amount of money being deposited to her bank account. How can she let that scare her? At 21, she successfully plugged herself in the world of business. Gaining millions of dollars overnight as she helped create the new social media crazed, Capitol Links, that society had fully invested itself in. It was a glorious moment for her. It was a time when the presence of her parents was caught under their own roof. Though when she said time, she meant a single night spent around the dinner table. A once in a blue moon night, when they were complete.

If it was up to her, she would not have minded even informing her parents of the happenings in her life. But young Prim, sweet 17 year old Prim, would. And if it meant putting a smile on her sister's face, then she would resist the itching feel at the back of her mind to change her name. Forget that she is Katniss Everdeen.

If only it was that easy.

But she tried not to fixate on it. 21-year old Katniss Everdeen may not have the best family in the world, but 21-year old Katniss Everdeen had millions of dollars in her bank account. Wasn't that what she was aiming to have? She almost felt invincible. That at a young age, she had been indulging herself with that much success already. But eager Katniss would never settle for good.

One night, she met Cinna. He is the head designer of the biggest fashion brand in Panem, Cinna, of course, he had to name the brand after himself. Katniss became sort of a muse to him without even knowing it. For several seasons, she became the inspiration to several collections of the man. Girl on fire, he would call her.

When she figured it out, she slowly developed an interest in fashion merchandising. Normally, she would hang out with the man, but the more time she spent with him, the more urge she felt into trying that route. Designing. And one sleepless night, she finally gave it a try. Cinna learned about this after a while and in a way, he became her mentor. Teaching her every detail about his personal experiences in designing.

On the 50th anniversary of the brand, 72 years old, Cinna announced in the celebration that he would be retiring. And that she would love to offer to 24-year old Katniss the position that he would be leaving. From there, things just happened. And suddenly, Katniss Everdeen is not just the co-founder of Capitol Links, but also the head designer of Cinna.

She was riding at the back of the world. Literally, she was. Her work with Cinna has been great. In her first year, her designs put on hundreds of million dollars in the earnings of the brand, which solidified her position in the company; meanwhile, her success with her social media stint was still going strong.

What more can she ask for? She is Katniss Everdeen. And this time, it was a name not made by her parents, but by herself.

It was a great life. It was perfect. The last few years had been a success story for her, yet again. She and her Capitol Links co-founders had new ideas about the new site that they would want to start. They knew it would be a hit. Meanwhile her work at Cinna was still going strong. Nothing in the world can put her down.

But in the back of her mind, she knew it was a lie.

And when her 30th birhday came, she knew she can't live in denial anymore.

* * *

 **Present:**

After a grueling time in Fashion Week, she feels like her body will just drop at any moment. But that doesn't stop her from going back to Twelve. And there she is, right at the town that she knows like the back of her hand.

 _Not much has changed._

As she looks around, she starts to remember memories she has had at this place. She wants to ignore the hollow feeling within her, but she just lets it through.

 _How did I forget all of these?_

Passing at the Hob, she remembers those times she spent with her friends there after a boring prom night when she was a Senior high school. She remembers how happy she was with Annie and Johanna, all those people she spent all her laughs with in that year.

She drives along the expressway and thinks about the way she laughed with Gale and Finnick about nothing as they drove in that exact same road. _Fun times, good old times_. She tells herself.

She has kept in touch with them. But they all have busy schedules. Though, just few months ago, she was with Gale and his girlfriend, Madge. They were in Four, having dinner at a restaurant beside a beach talking about the vast improvement that Gale's business had been experiencing lately. After finishing the course of meal laid out to her, Katniss asked them if they wanted to walk in the shore with her. Madge agreed, but Gale told her that he had something to say to Madge. And he wanted Katniss to be a witness.

It wasn't that much of a surprise when Gale proposed to Madge. They've been together for quite some time. And if it wasn't for Gale's busy schedule in the past years, Katniss thought the couple would've been married earlier.

 _Marriage._

Being 30, Katniss knows her expiration date would come soon. Or if it hasn't yet. It's not like she's desperate to get married. Or that guys are resistant to get involved with her. In fact, there are couple of men in her life. The recent lover she had was Darius, a head of a security agent company. Thinking about it, she did have a good time with him. But she realized soon enough that she only enjoyed his company in bed. And she had a feeling their feelings were mutual about it.

One night, after some intimate moment, the man talked to her quietly, telling her that he found a girl. He told Katniss how thankful he was that she gave him what she wanted for the past year. And all gibberish that Katniss translated to, "Thank you for letting me fuck you for the past year. Here's my farewell fuck."

She didn't feel betrayed because they were never official, but she still can't shake the thought that maybe if she tried a little harder, and did not label her relationship with him as what it was, then maybe things could've gone further.

As the man left, she told herself, "Nahhh, you'll find someone new."

But of course, she didn't.

Feeling nostalgic and hungry, she decides to stop by Sae. Thinking of ordering her favorite dish, lamb stew.

 _The thing that I'll always come back at in 12._ She smiles.

As she enters, a blonde lady directs her to a table. Katniss does not bother asking for the menu, and immediately orders a Lamb Stew. The girl smiles and asks if she still has anything to order. Katniss looks at the name tag of the girl in front of her, and she returns the smile.

"No. That's it for now, Delly." Delly smiles widely once again, and Katniss reminds herself to give her a generous tip later on. Genuine smiles rarely come in Katniss' life nowadays.

After few minutes, a young man, approaches her table with her order. Katniss does not miss the way the guy's eyes widen. She doesn't understand why. But she pushes the thought aside as she takes a good look at him.

He is tall. That is the first thing she noticed. She suddenly wonders where else he is gifted length wise.

The guy has blonde hair and extremely blue eyes. It's almost like she is looking at the beautiful, blue ocean in Four. She can't help but admire how perfectly symmetrical his face is. Through his thin polo shirt, he could almost see what he was hiding underneath.

It takes her a while to realize that she is staring at him. And that he can clearly see that. But she certainly doesn't care. Seeing the effect that it has on him.

"Here is your order." He says in his deep voice, avoiding her gaze. "Have a nice dinner."

"Thank you." She replies, and before he could turn away, she discreetly looks at his nameplate… Peeta.

 _Peeta._

She licks her lips and eats her dinner in silence. Although, once in a while, she'll sneak a glance at Peeta. She knows, he knows she is looking. And he is still clearly trying to avoid her gaze by keeping a serious look on his face. Somehow, the expression doesn't fit with his soft features. But oddly, she finds it extremely sexy that she finds it impossible to keep her eyes off of him.

She finished her dinner. And when she is about to call for the bill, she sees that Peeta is finally looking at her. But he quickly turns back when he meets her gaze. And she couldn't help but make an impression on the way Peeta's ass was caught up in his jeans…

 _Fuck._ At that point, she knows. She's fucking this boy tonight.

When he finally turns around, she raises a hand to him. The guy quickly comes over. "What can I do, ma'am?"

She asks what dessert he can recommend, and he tells her that the cheese cake is good.

"Okay, then." Nodding at his suggestion.

"Anything else?" He asked. His Adam's apple bobs and she crosses her arms, looking up at him. "Are you originally from here?" Surprised at the question, he nods. When he returns with the cheese cake, she doesn't hesitate to ask.

"When is your shift ending?"


	2. Chapter 2

_Just a minute._ She thinks.

She left Sae 10 minutes before it's closing time. 10 PM. Apparently, Peeta couldn't leave earlier. It seems closing the restaurant is also part of his duty.

When she asked him, when his shift would end, he didn't seem to get what she was implying. It was just then she started to wonder, how old the boy was. Surely he can't be younger than 21. Not much difference with her age. Well, in her mind at least. But he nodded. And so Katniss assumed later on that the deal for that night was set.

She waited for 15 more minutes. Scowling, she wonders if Peeta ends up ditching her. Watching the others drive away in their cars, she felt shame running within her. No. Not shame. She is exasperated. It is not a common occurrence that she initiates such things. As a matter of fact, she's never done it before. Waiting for some guy to finish his shift, while she waits in her car in hopes of getting fucked. No. This is not very Katniss Everdeen. She realizes how desperate he probably thinks she is. And she gets even more mad. How dare he leave without saying anything?

She's already out of her car, when she sees Peeta get out of the restaurant. Immediately, he notices her. And she stops in her track.

 _Damn. He really is beautiful._

"Hey!" She shouts.

Peeta responds with a quick nod. She frowns, sensing that the boy is either shy or sending her away. She asks him where he is heading in a seductive tone.

"Home." But it seems to not be working.

Okay, maybe he is sending her away. But she reminds herself that she didn't wait for nothing. If he ends up going home alone, instead of with her. Then she must at least smack his face for letting her wait.

"It is just near here." He says suddenly. Looking nervously at her.

Katniss relaxes, and she doesn't even realize that her shoulders are tensed. He swallows. And Katniss couldn't help but smirk.

He is a mystery to her.

She leads him into her car, and soon enough Peeta is pointing the direction of where his apartment is. She fights the urge to stop the car, and just let the business go down inside it. But looking at him, surely, the anticipation will be worth it.

"I have some proposal to talk to you into." she blurts out.

"Oh, I thought…" he trails off. As if he is suddenly embarrassed.

Katniss wants to laugh, but she doesn't want to ruin the delicious tension between the two of them. "Of course, we'll still get down to that later."

"Okay What is it?" God. She can already imagine him groaning in that deep, sexy voice.

Katniss isn't sure how to tell Peeta that she wants him to model for Cinna, when she is originally actually intending to bed him rather than talk him into something. It's just an idea that suddenly pops up in her head. Luckily, Peeta seems to be quite good with getting words out of people. And she starts talking about the job.

He squints at her and she can feel the doubt rising through him. "I'll think about it. But thank you for the offer."

Though Katniss gets the impression that he doesn't seem to be interested. She is a little bit surprised, but she did not show it. There are some people she knows, who without a doubt would've grabbed that opportunity at any second. But, she guesses Peeta really isn't just 'some people'. When they arrive at his apartment, she doesn't even think of letting him step further in the front door, and her lips are already over his.

She feels Peeta freeze, but that doesn't stop her. Katniss wonders if it's due to shock or if he's inexperience. She doubts the latter.

 _A guy who looks like that, surely has no problem getting the girl he wants._ She thinks.

He tries to reciprocate the kiss, but he doesn't quite catch up. He tastes a bit like cinammon, and when her tounge strikes his, she knows the night will be good.

She is about to push him on the couch, but he stops her right away. Confused, Peeta pulls her in his bedroom, and a smirk appears on her face. Once they are inside, Katniss takes off her shirt quickly.

"Ah, shit." Peeta blurts out.

It is just then when it hits Katniss. And she froze in an instant. She suddenly wonders if she might be stepping on someone's boyfriend. She shakes her head gently, telling her to wait for him to explain. Though, it shouldn't really surprise her anymore. It is not the first time that it happened to her, and she's quite certain there could be more to come. The exasperation she felt earlier seems to be creeping back up again.

A wide eyed Peeta stares up at her, and she raises an eyebrow when he hesitates.

"You have a girlfriend?" She crosses her arms. But she is quite satisfied when an expression of disbelief appears on his face.

"No." He whispers. "Um, I'm not sure I have a stock of condom at the moment. And.."

Katniss smiles in relief, and she kisses him again.

"Shhh.. I'm on pills." Ignoring the look he gives her. "Are you safe?"

"Uh, yeah." He replies. She's quite surprise at her tenacity to sleep with the guy. Never has she waited outside a restaurant for a night enjoyment, or have sex with no protection to strangers prior to this. But there is something about him that she can't point out, which is weird because she doesn't even know his last name. And she knows she can't let herself be bothered by it anymore. Looking at the boy standing in front of him, all she wants to do is just rip his clothes off.

Katniss traces the outline of his jaw. "You are sexy." She said. Trying to lure him in.

And that set Peeta off.

He pulls her in, trailing kisses on her neck. Katniss caresses his chest and asks him to take his shirt off. Her senses do not lie as she looks down at his body.

 _Ripped_. There's nothing more than what she wants to do, but to take his pants off and just take him in her mouth. And she does. She feels a tug inside her thighs as she pushes Peeta down the bed. In a second, she is on top of him. She kisses his neck going down to his hard stomach. Immediately pulling his pants off, she grabs his cock through his boxers and when she removes the fabric. _God_. She swears, she can indulge herself in this kind of heaven.

He looks up shyly at her, but she is still looking at his long and thick cock. Without hesitation, she takes him in. Peeta curses, and at that moment, she doesn't even know how more she can feel attracted to this guy. She engulfs her tongue around the head of his cock and Peeta groans. It is exactly like she imagined it. She continues sucking him, going up and down. As she goes deeper, Peeta groans harder. He pulls her hair quite hard when she licks the slit of his cock. But she doesn't mind, in fact it makes her clit throb.

She has no idea she can still be even more turned on at the moment.

Releasing him, she takes every remaining of clothing off of her. The look on Peeta's face is priceless. She takes the expression as a sign that he is feeling the same way. And surely, she knows she has the same look on her face right now. She goes back on top of him, and grabs Peeta's hands, placing them on her breasts. He squeezes them slowly, and she takes the time to position her entrance towards his cock. Breathless, she moves towards Peeta, biting his lower lip. She feels him stretch her fully as he enters her, and she makes a sound at the back of her throat.

She doesn't miss the way the Peeta's eyes roll up in pleasure. And just like what she wants. There they are. Fucking.

She can't keep her hands off of Peeta and Peeta can't keep his hands off of her breasts. Sliding herself up and down his cock, she is quite surprised how Peeta is letting her do all the work. But she likes it, and she does what she's always known to do. She takes control.

Over their heavy breathing, the stress of the day and the nostalgia she is feeling, Katniss feels relaxed and empowered. At that point, it is like it's just the two them in the world. For a moment, she can live with that. She is brought away from these thoughts as Peeta places two fingers inside her. She moans in pleasure and she closes her eyes. Then suddenly, she feels his mouth on her nipple, and there's no way she can't last longer. She opens her eyes and caresses Peeta's chest; in return, he thrusts hard and faster inside her. She feels her walls tense up.

Gripping Peeta's arms, she feels her world slowly falling apart. She comes. Hard. And it feels like it is the first time she's done it in years. Peeta is still thrusting within her. His face filled with pleasure, which makes her smile in return. In that time, she takes an opportunity to get a good look at him.

 _Beautiful._ A piece of art, in Katniss' mind.

Her thoughts are interrupted as suddenly, she feels him tensed up and slides out of her. Curious. She watches him wrap his hands around his own cock. Eyes closed, stroking himself up and down. He grunts his pleasure as he comes himself on the mattress. The ecstasy evident on his face.

Katniss stares at him, but she feels so tired. That she couldn't help but just lay down. She says as she watches him go to the bathroom.

"I told you I'm on pills." She closes her eyes.

And she doesn't know what happens next.

Peeta is not in the room when she wakes up. Looking around the unfamiliar room, her gaze settles at the sun rising from the window. Once again, memories fill her waking thoughts and she smiles.

She gets out of the bed and heads straight to the bathroom. She fixes herself up and when she exits, Peeta is still nowhere to be found. Wondering, she quickly dresses up and goes out of the bedroom.

His apartment isn't big. It is actually quite empty. Except for the paintings on the wall. Everything is placed accordingly in the room. A sense of calmness. Something she hasn't felt in a long time. She will trade her mansion for a day to spend one more night in the comfortable place, but of course, Peeta needs to be there.

Remembering him, she calls out his name… But no one answers.

Worried, she goes out. And it just hits her that she is in the Slag Heap street. The abandoned place in Twelve. The place where… she shudders, and shakes her head. Trying not to concentrate on it. Looking around, the calmness is dragged away. And she wants nothing but to leave.

But she stays steadily on her spot. Waiting for a blonde guy to pop up in her view.

 _Where the fuck is he?_


	3. Chapter 3

And as she decided to turn around to leave, Peeta appears in the corner of the street, holding a paper bag with a smile on his face. His curly, blonde hair looks even lighter with the sunlight shining through it. Katniss suddenly remembers how she ran his hands through them last night. She can't help but feel light within. He hasn't seen her yet standing outside the door, but it's enough for Katniss to start to relax. But still, she can't shake away the heavy feeling on her chest.

As if on cue, Peeta spots her standing outside his apartment door, and Katniss is almost sure she sees his face turning red. She looks down at what she's wearing, and realize she is only in her underwear and Peeta's shirt that is almost twice as big for her. She smiles at him.

From the way he fucked her last night, she finds it quite endearing how squeamish he is.

"Where the hell have you been?" She asks jokingly when he is close enough.

"I didn't you'd woken up right away." He explains. "I brought food."

And she is glad he did.

The cheese buns he said he baked might just be the most delicious thing she has put in her mouth... well, if it's just food they are talking about. And just from the smell of the rabbit stew he cooked, she can already feel her mouth watering up.

He eats quietly as they sit around a table. She decides to let them finish their breakfast first before she asks the question that has been bugging her. What exactly is he doing in the Slag Heap? She is very sure that no one has lived there for years. But then again, it's the first time she's come in the place ever since the incident she witnessed back when she was 17.

Sipping on her hot chocolate, she notices Peeta looking.

"So did you like it?"

She sets the cup down, and leans forward to him. "Which one?" she asks almost whispering.

He swallows, and his eyes widen. But Katniss did not let him start even a response.

"I did." she leans back to her chair, and raises a brow, grabbing another cheese bun. "Every part of it." she says, thinking about the night they spent together.

He smiles darkly in understanding. It takes an effort for Katniss not to control her breathing at the look he gave. And instead she continues the conversation.

"Well, I already answered your question." She says calmly. "Guess it's my turn."

"Hit me, then." He licks his lips. And Katniss isn't sure it's just a one dimensional question.

She likes this side of him.

"What are you doing in this part of the town?" she asks. "I'm quite sure this has been emptied in the past couple of years."

"Not in the past years." He replies. "Actually, some people have started moving in again. The mayor did not stop them. I mean, these are owned by their families after all."

"Oh, so this is actually..." she pauses intentionally.

"It was actually an old place of my father..." he trails off. "When he was younger."

For some reason, he looks uncomfortable, so Katniss did not press further. If they start talking about their families, she doesn't know what she'll end up blurting out.

"Well, nice of you to take me here." She said sarcastically.

He laughs a little bit, probably thinking that Katniss figures out that he hasn't even been here for quite some time as well. And he's right, she did. It's the only obvious explanation why the place looks almost bare.

"I'm sure you don't want my little brothers hearing our intimate conversations, don't you." He says. If it wasn't for his kind eyes, she would've thought the talk would be going dirty soon enough.

But she is up for it, in case he is.

"Intimate." She crosses her arms. "Interesting."

Peeta hesitates. And she can practically feel an on going debate in his head. But whatever it could be, she guesses she should just expect the unexpected. It seems the best way to get along with a guy like him.

"Well it is." she continues. "You're right. I don't think you wouldn't want them to hear you groaning in pleasure."

His mouth gapes slightly at her statement, but she stands up. Bending over, to give him a kiss. She breaks away quickly. She doesn't really want to. But she feels the need to make him want her even more. Make the cat chase the gleam of light, and it will never stop. Games. A little game won't hurt anyone. Especially when its end results will make the process more special.

"I'll see you around." she says.

Because clearly, Katniss has no intention of letting their time together be just a one time experience.

* * *

It was hard for Katniss at first, but she learned how to deal with it. At first, she felt alone. That she can't say anything. As if her tounge had been cut off that she can't say it.

Can't say anything about Adelaida Everdeen, her own mother, being unfaithful to her father, Ramon Everdeen.

Her relationship with her mother has never been good, if she is being honest with herself. She doesn't know why exactly, but in every decision that Katniss made, she was there to contradict it.

When she was 8 and wanted to perform a musical number in her school, her mother did not let her and instead sent her to Advanced Math classes. When she fell in love with archery, her mother made sure Katniss wouldn't have time for it by asking Effie Trinket to teach her how to behave properly like a lady. Like how the woman would always tell her.

But even through the cold relationship she had with her, not once had she doubted her mother's undying love for her father. In fact, she knows her mother did love him. A lot. Still does. But there was a time when her father was rarely home. In a year, Adelaida would only see Ramon once or twice. It was almost like having a dead father.

If Katniss hated it, she can't even imagine what it was like for her mother, knowing how attached she was to him. She can only imagine, the frustration and sadness that must have consumed her mother through the years. No doubt, that she went for the company of her husband's best friend. The other person who knew her husband almost as much as she did.

Several times, Katniss noticed how her mother had been consistently absent during dinner time. She might have never been as motherly towards them as much as Katniss would hope. But if there was one thing, she would always do, it was to make sure that she joined her children during dinner.

If it wasn't for Prim asking her persistently where their mother could be and the fact that it was her 17th birthday, she wouldn't have followed her one night in the Slag Heap. And she wouldn't have seen her mother in the arms of another man. Her mother's lips on the mouth of another man.

She didn't know what happened next, but she found herself screaming in the woods. Kicking on the ground as if it was the reason for what she had just seen.

The next day, she was surprised to see the man come up to her. She tried to remain indifferent around his presence, but he clearly wasn't buying it.

"You wouldn't tell anyone, right, Sweetheart?"

She felt dread filling her whole being. He did see her that night. Trying to remain calm, she nodded, but of course she didn't keep the promise. Instead, she made a promise to herself to bring the two of them down.

Through relentlessness and the help of Gale, whose parents practiced law, soon enough, she figured out Coriolanus Snow's stink.

Snow came from a poor family. Didn't even finish high school. But at a young age, money had started overflowing in his life. How? He was the biggest supplier of methamphetamine in Panem. And the production was happening right at the whole village of Slag Heap, the south part of Twelve. It was a conflicting decision for Katniss. She didn't know what the consequences could be when you mess with a man like him. But with the promise of the federation, she busted the man under the table.

It was a horrific time for Twelve. Well, the whole country in fact. There had been smokes, gun shots, and shades of blood right at the heart of the Slag Heap, throughout the whole time that the incident occurred. It took a while for the government to break all connections of the Cartel in the rest of Panem. And when they did Snow had nowhere to go, but to the jail.

Her mother ended up in a state of depression during the time. At a time, it was too much that she even hit an overdose. Prim found her on the floor. Unconscious. The little girl cried her tears out until their father returned to 12 to fix the situation. Sometimes Katniss wondered if it her mother turned to drugs because of what happened to Snow or if it's a ploy to get her father's attention. She suspected it was the last one.

Katniss thought a lot about it, but she knew it would've to happen sooner or later. She told her father about the affair that her mother had with Snow. Although much to her frustration, her father revealed that knew it all along. And that he understood where her mother was coming from. After he did the exact same thing to her years ago.

She regretted Snow's imprisonment.

At one point, Katniss wished she never figured it out. Maybe she would've never resented her parents as much as she does now. But at the same time, she doesn't think it would've helped her see what her family had turn into. What she had turned into. And she would've never learned how to deal with it.

Going back to Twelve, as she stands in the middle of the woods, now, she is assured things happened the way they should. She may still have her inhibitions at the moment, but she'll learn how to fix them. She doesn't know yet, but she'll figure it out.

"Katniss." A familiar voice suddenly calls out.

Surprised, she turns around to see a blonde man she has literally tried to familiarize herself with. And trust her, she will. She smiles at him.

"Peeta."

And suddenly she wonders how he even figured out her name.


	4. Chapter 4

"Oh God." She gasps as Peeta thrusts into her erratically.

"I'm coming, Katniss."

"I know." She gasps again, clenching her walls around Peeta's cock. When he starts to grunt, Katniss bites his lower lip.

And he comes. This time, inside her.

She is aware that she said she'll try to make things slow between them, but when she saw him standing in front of her. All wet from the lake, and the dampness of his shirt showing his muscular built, she instinctively forgot whatever pact she made with herself.

Seems like she catches herself in her own game.

She lays down with Peeta on the forest floor for a while. Not really caring that she probably has dirt all over her. Abruptly, he sits up, reaching out to her. Katniss swallows, not really knowing what to think. But then, he removes a leaf from her hair, and she squints at him, questioning.

"What are you doing here?" she asks.

"I go here every noon. Catch some fish or pick some berries."

Katniss sits up, taking him in eye level. "I didn't realize you're familiar with hunting."

Peeta grins. And the boyish charm of it is enough for Katniss to smile back. "I'm not. Actually." He replies. "It's even a rare occasion for me to catch some fish." He looks over at the small pail containing the fish that Katniss doesn't even realize is there until now.

"I can teach you some time."

Peeta's brows shoot up. "Of course, you know how to."

 _What does that mean?_ She asks herself. But she does not say it out loud. Instead several questions start popping up in her head. _How did you know my name when I've never said it to you? How old are you? What's your last name? How come it's you who's showing up at the times when I'm in need of some company?_

But she will never dare say it out loud.

"Well yeah, I used to hunt here before."

They stay quiet for a while. But it isn't an awkward one, which is a surprise for her. Considering she has only known him for a day. She feels comfortable. And she's glad Peeta seems to be feeling the same way already.

* * *

"I remember this being a different place back when I was younger." Katniss says. "But then again, it's been nearly 12 years, so I guess it's inevitable."

A woman whose face is caked with make-up leans closer to her, as if she is talking about some murderer in the loose. "I wouldn't say that exactly. It only changed around 2 years ago. The man who owned this now wasn't convinced the bakery should still be named Mellark's after what happened."

She nods. She asks her what exactly happened. It seems like the right question to ask, but in all honesty she doesn't really care. Conversations are not something she's very good at. But throughout the years, she has learnt that as long as she's the one who sends out the questions, then she will have no problem.

"I actually worked for the guy, who owned this. Well before he died." She continues and leans even closer to Katniss that the latter has to move back slightly. Feeling awkward in the situation. "He was a good man. Although, I can't say the same for his wife."

TMI. She wants to call out. Well, if it isn't for Peeta's presence, she would've been out of the bakery already. She looks over at him, who appears at the back door. And she smiles at him, which he gladly returns.

After spending the afternoon with him in the woods, he invited her to come to the bakery he said he was working at. Cheese buns time, he said. Pointing out how she seemed to quite like it during their breakfast that morning. And he was right. She asked about him having two jobs, but he shrugged it off. Correcting her instead that he actually has 3.

The woman catches back her attention when she points out to Peeta. "That guy. It was his parents, who owned this before."

She almost spits out the ice tea she just sipped. _Wait._ _Shit._ The look on her face must be so comical right now, but thankfully, the woman remained oblivious. She doesn't want to explain what that was all about.

 _His parents.. which means..._

And suddenly it's not too much information for Katniss.

"He was only 16 at that time."

 _16\. Two years ago._ She swallows, trying hard not to reflect on her actions, and instead she listens to the woman in front of her. But yet, she finds herself drifting away to the distracted land, which she tries her very best to abandon.

"The poor kid has to take care of his two younger siblings. He didn't want them to go to the community home. So he took in charge. Sold the bakery to its owner now, Haymitch, with the deal to have the man pretend as their guardian. Until he turns 18. At least. When he finally did this year, he immediately claimed legal responsibility to his two brothers."

Any kind of response that she wants to formulate keeps being blocked away. Peeta. 18 year-old Peeta Mellark. It is no use trying not to dwell on the fact that she has slept with an 18 year old. There is just too many emotions right now for the creepy feel to win out. But she's sure it will eat her up later.

The poor boy. She thinks back about the time when she was 18. Katniss feels heartless in comparison. She handled the problem with her parents through resentment and anger. Meanwhile, Peeta took care of his' through love and kindness. The desire to raise his brothers on his own.

If only she knows that he's been through this much...

Shame. She knows now. It's what wins out against all the emotions that cluster up in her heart. She wants to say more. Ask more. But she's scared of what she might end up knowing.

She tries to think of what her friend Johanna would tell her. "Shut up, and shove some cheese buns down your throat."

A good idea, probably. And she does.

But the woman continues. "I was concerned at first what Haymitch would do. He was a known drunkard in this town. But to my surprise, he actually took care of them. In the best knowledge that he can at least. Hired the boy to continue working in the bakery."

"He's been through a lot that boy. Her mother used to beat her up. But he still maintains a smile on his face every time I saw him when he was younger."

Now, it really isn't making Katniss feel any better. The thought of Peeta being beaten makes Katniss grips hard on the table.

Her sentiments are stopped when Peeta approaches her. "Oh hey, Leevy." He greets the woman. They exchange few words, until a customer enters.

"I'll leave you then." She looks at Katniss. "It's nice talking to you."

Katniss nods, but she still feels distracted. She doesn't think she can look at Peeta the same way again.

She is quite sure her expression is readable, but she's glad Peeta seems to be ignoring it. Or he's just not seeing it. She doubts it's the latter. Instead, he sets out a plate of a piece of cake in front of her. "Try this. It's a mango and strawberry short cake."

She attempts to smile, shifting uncomfortable in her seat. "You're going to make me fat, don't you?"

Is it odd that she suddenly feels like a mother in front of him even though she's only 12 years older?

"Well if it doesn't bother you." He laughs. "It's just something new I invented. I want to know what you think."

She tastes a bite from her fork. As it melts deliciously on her tongue, she smiles.

"Oh, wow. It's really good." She says genuinely, taking another bite. "I never knew you can pair those two flavours perfectly."

"It's my little secret." He replies, smirking.

But Katniss does not reply. Or she just doesn't know how. She takes the time to get a good look at him. He really looks quite young. Especially with those soulful, blue eyes. If it wasn't for his broad shoulders and manly built, she would've never realized that.

Sitting silently, she thinks of a starting conversation. However, Peeta is quick to jump on her mood. If he just tried to ignore a while ago the look on her face, he probably can't now. Katniss isn't even trying to hide what she is feeling.

"What is it?" He asks.

She hesitates, but he fills the silence up for her. "Is it about something Leevy said?"

She still doesn't reply. She isn't sure how Peeta would react about someone gossiping about him. "My parents?"

 _Your parents. Your siblings. Your jobs. You._

"Yeah. I'm sorry, Peeta." she apologizes contritely.

"Thank you, but it's fine now." He says. They stay quiet for a while. The only sound in the room is of the wind chime, indicating people coming in and out of the bakery. Her phone rings several times, but she just ignores the calls. They can wait for later. She wants to say something to erase the current mood, but when she tries, Peeta stops her.

"It's fine, really." He says. "It's fine."

Katniss sits up straight, and just sighs. "I'm sorry for finding out this way. I didn't mean to involve myself in the gossip around the town." She says, knowing how some people like having their privacy be respected. She is talking based on experience.

"I don't mind, like what I said." He reples. "Seems like you have an understanding about it, without making feel like a pathetic, pitiful person."

"I don't think you are." She replies. And she doesn't think he is. After what she heard, she actually sees him as the opposite of those words. Only eighteen. But already wise beyond his years.

"I believe you." He sighs. "Well, my shift is done." He suddenly says.

And Katniss laughs, remembering how she asked him the previous night when his shift was ending.

"Reading my mind, huh?" She crosses her arms, still smiling.

"No." He says. "Maybe."

But then he gets serious. And Katniss' breath hitches as he smirks. "What do you have in mind now?"


End file.
